so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
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I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
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I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.