the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
