Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
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