well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize