So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
The air taste purple.
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