I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
