I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
