Welp...herpes.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
