i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize
