next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize