she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize