I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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