Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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