angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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