What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
it's like iHOP with fire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize