Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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