i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
