The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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