508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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