She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I just want nice things and good sex
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Randomize
