I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
You need Xanax blowdarts
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
