At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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