Tell her she can't have a vagina
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.