Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
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It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
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If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.