Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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