he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize