Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
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