Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
