Where did you get a picture of my penis
I am in a vortex of obligation.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
