I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
