covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
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