I am puke
one might say we're banned from that church
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize