new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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