Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
