Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
you never un-have a 4some
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
