Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Randomize
