So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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