I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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