I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night