a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
how does that bad decision feel?
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
