Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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