She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap