Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
25 People Confess What They Really Think When They See An Obese Person
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible