No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
operation harelip BJ is a go
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
