Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
