bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
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So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
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Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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