But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Randomize
