We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
