He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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