I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Randomize