just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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