rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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