hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
